Thursday, 31 July 2014

The motivation behind my choices

I question myself a lot. Do I walk the talk? What is my motivation for doing this or that? Why do I react the way I do? Am I handling my reaction in a constructive manner?

Some of my questions when it comes to polyamory is Why I am doing it, and Whether I will stick with it, and Am I trying to avoid something.

Thus the initial resonance when it comes to this blog post - I only started reading her blog very recently, the post about colonialism, but OH so interesting, and so much resonance, and so interesting again, and I learn stuff and I get a-ha moments and I realise stuff and I get stuff to chew on. Worth a read!

This post in particular had a strong resonance with me throughout.

Relevant to me excerpt:

"But unlike the anti-commitment mavericks, I don’t want to reject love and meaningful attachment to other humans in the form of romantic relationships. To be sure, I’m nervous of the pain they can bring: but I know I want it. I am like this in friendship too. I crave platonic ties that enfold love and intimacy that will last to our dying days. Ultimately, being non-monogamous does not free me from the work and emotional risk of love and commitment. Rather, it re-shapes what love and commitment (can) look like, requiring me to negotiate them with multiple partners instead of one. Poly can also sometimes blur the boundaries between platonic and romantic love. A caveat: I’m not knocking sex for the sake of sex. For some people that is what fulfills them. It is not sufficient for the intimacy I crave." 

No comments:

Post a Comment

Be nice!